Uber (Backseat) Freestyle Lyrics
Passenger:
I despise maneuvering in Ubers
Putin tracks them hacked computers
But my bucket kicked the bucket
And I'm rushin' man so fuck it
I request a UberBLACK
Reject it
Switch my pic to look uber white
And as you guessed, yes, it's accepted
When the rented chauffeur shows
Pop the door, hop in the back
Show 'em on a map where to move
Tell 'em I ain't in a mood to rap
If you keep your lips zipped, you'll get your big tip
And I'll rate your car five stars
A couple bad ratings, you at the gas station
And you living in your car
God forbid you got some student loans
Homework while you work from home
I'm a hypocritical asshole
For asking you to leave me alone
Pull up the phone, call up one of my own
See if they're watching the throne
I should be home, give me a minute or so
Hang up the phone
Bro where are you going
Shoulda turned left at the corner
Dude are you reading the map?
What kind of scam are you running?
Do you take me as a dummy?
Dude I demand you talk back
Hello, Houston
Got no time for this nonsense
Got no patience for nuisance
If that brain contains a conscience
Speak up and say the truth
And tell me where we're going, going, going, going
No response, can't call the cops
No bars I can't be heard
I'm a dead man, got no plan
Next car I rent's a hearse
Shoulda known not to roll the dice
Had my fears
Half these dudes don't last a year
Basically, make minimum wage
Subtract maintenance then the wear and tear
Disguise price gouging and surge prices
50X if we get struck by ISIS
Minorities get lower pay
But in the USA, that's not too surprising
Gave 'em a license to tap your device
Sign away rights just to keep on the lights
In bed with the NSA
https://www.elyricsworld.com/uber_(backseat)_freestyle_lyrics_super_deluxe.html
Inbred, pregnancy
Driver:
Excuse me sir I think I'm lost
Passenger:
Oh holy shit I didn't know you talked
Driver:
You said to keep my mouth shut
So I wore earbuds and I didn't hear nothing
Passenger:
Yeah, well, you passed the [?] like back a mile
If you checked the map
We wouldn't have this problem
Hit the U-turn and make the fuel burn
And we'll both pretend this didn't transpire
Driver:
Well let me ask you what did you say?
Passenger:
I was talking about the Uber way
How you're underpaid and you're overworked
And how it may explain why you missed the turn
And I know how you deal with jerks
Stressed out, only makes it worse
Write it down from the top down
But since you're the one who works here
Tell me how's it going
Tell me how's it going
Driver:
Well, it ain't as awful as you think
I lived in silicon valley chauffeuring the kings
There's fourteen core beliefs
One is always be hustling
There's no time for sleep as a hungry underling
We got treated to the sin city
Had a retreat with our bosses
Started out with team building
Ended with them cutting losses
Under performing employees play human piñatas
Some call these horror stories
I say do what you got to do
The law is arbitrary
Legislators are subsidiaries
Arianna Huffington will bury ya' in the obituaries
Nefarious but do your job
And there's no need for stressing
Relax
Life's a ride when you drive for a living
Twenty four-seven, three-sixty-five life is splendid
I was sent out to LA when the pilot program ended
I'm an ambassador for Travis Kalanick, my lord and master
Passenger:
His resignation doesn't play a factor?
Driver:
He resigned? Initialize TK kill switch
Godspeed
