Boot To The Head Lyrics
BOOT TO THE HEAD<br />
<br />
performed by the Frantics<br />
<br />
<br />
PART I : THE LESSON<br />
<br />
<br />
MASTER: Approach student, close the circle at the feet of the master. You<br />
have come to me asking that I be your guide along the path of Tae Kwon<br />
Leap. But, be warned: To learn its ways, you must learn the ways of your<br />
own soul. Let us meditate on this wisdom now. So: Ohhhhmmmmm...<br />
<br />
STUDENT1 (Ed Gruberman): Uh, sir! Sir! (Oo!, Oo!) Sir!<br />
<br />
MASTER: Who disturbs our meditation, as a pebble disturbs the stillness of<br />
the pond?<br />
<br />
EG: Me! Ed Gruberman!<br />
<br />
MASTER: E-Ed Gruberman.<br />
<br />
EG: Yeah, uh, no disrespect or nuthin', but, uh, how long is this gonna take?<br />
<br />
MASTER: Tae Kwon Leap is not a path to a door, but a road leading<br />
forever towards the horizon.<br />
<br />
EG: So like, what, an hour or so?<br />
<br />
MASTER: No, no, we have not even begun upon the path. Ed Gruberman, you<br />
must learn patience.<br />
<br />
EG: Yeah yeah yeah, patience. How long will that take?<br />
<br />
MASTER: Time has no meaning. To a true student, a year is as a day.<br />
<br />
EG: A YEAR??? I wanna beat people up right now! I got the pajamas! Yah<br />
yah yah hwoom!<br />
<br />
MASTER: 'Beat people up'...<br />
<br />
EG: Yeah! Just show me all those nifty moves so I can start trashing<br />
bozos! That's all I came here for! YO ASTA STA STA!!! Pretty good, ey?<br />
<br />
MASTER: The only use of Tae Kwon Leap is self-defense. Do you know who<br />
said that? Ki Lo Ni, the great teacher.<br />
<br />
EG: Yeah? Well the best defense is a good offense, you know who said<br />
that? Mel, the cook on 'Alice'.<br />
<br />
MASTER: Tae Kwon Leap is the wine of purity, not the vinegar of<br />
hostility. Meditate upon this truth with us. Ohmmmmmm.....<br />
<br />
EG: Listen, shrimp! Now are you gonna show me some fancy moves, or am I<br />
gonna start wipin' the walls with you?<br />
<br />
MASTER: Ed Gruberman, you fail to grasp Tae Kwon Leap. Approach me that<br />
you might see.<br />
<br />
EG: All right! Finally some action!<br />
<br />
MASTER: Observe closely, class. Boot to the Head! (SH-ZOOMP!)<br />
<br />
EG (drunkenly): Owww! You booted me in the head!<br />
<br />
MASTER: You are lucky, Ed Gruberman. Few novices experience so much of<br />
Tae Kwon Leap so soon.<br />
<br />
EG (quietly, to himself): Ow, oh, my head!<br />
<br />
MASTER: Now we continue. Ohhhmmmmm...<br />
<br />
EG: Hey! I wasn't ready! Come and get me now shorty, hah? Come on, are<br />
ya chicken?<br />
<br />
MASTER: Boot to the head! (SH-ZOOMP!)<br />
<br />
EG (again, drunkenly): Oww! Okay, now I'm ready, okay, now, come on, try it<br />
now.<br />
<br />
MASTER: Boot to the head! (SH-ZOOMP!)<br />
<br />
EG: Mind if I just lie down here for a minute?<br />
<br />
MASTER: Now class, we shall return to our..<br />
<br />
STUDENT2: Master?<br />
<br />
MASTER: It is wrong to tip the vessel of knowledge, student.<br />
<br />
STUDENT2: Many apologies, master. But I feel Ed Gruberman is not wholly wrong.<br />
<br />
MASTER: What do you mean?<br />
<br />
STUDENT2: I want to boot some head, too.<br />
<br />
MASTER: Have you learned nothing from the lesson of Ed Gruberman?<br />
<br />
STUDENT2: Yes, master. I have learned two things. First, that anger<br />
https://www.elyricsworld.com/boot_to_the_head_lyrics_the_frantics.html
is a weapon only to one's opponent.<br />
<br />
MASTER: Very good.<br />
<br />
STUDENT2: And secondly, get in the first shot. Boot to the head. (SH-ZOOMP!)<br />
<br />
MASTER: You missed.<br />
<br />
STUDENT2: Yeah. Well...<br />
<br />
MASTER: You too shall be honored to learn a lesson...<br />
<br />
STUDENT2: You don't have to, you know. I gotta be going...<br />
<br />
MASTER: Boot to the head! (SH-ZOOMP!)<br />
<br />
STUDENT2 (agonizing pain): Oyyy oy oyyyy.... Oh....<br />
<br />
MASTER: Can anyone tell us what lesson has been learned here?<br />
<br />
STUDENT3: Yes, master. Not a single one of us could defeat you.<br />
<br />
MASTER: You gain wisdom, child.<br />
<br />
STUDENT3: So we'll hafta gang up on ya! Get 'im guys!<br />
<br />
(Master throws many Boot-to-the-head's and SH-ZOOMP's, and people are groaning<br />
in pain)<br />
<br />
MASTER: And now class, let us rejoin the mind to the body and gaze into <br />
the heart of the candle of meditation.<br />
<br />
UNISON: Ohhhmmmm.... <br />
<br />
MASTER: Very good, class.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
PART II : THE SONG<br />
<br />
<br />
Yi yi yai yi.... <br />
<br />
People talking in movie shows, <br />
People smoking in bed!<br />
People voting Republican,<br />
Give them a boot to the head!<br />
<br />
Boot to the Head! Yah, yah...<br />
Boot to the Head! Yah, yah...<br />
Boot to the Head! Yah, yah...<br />
Boot to the Head! Yah yah yah.. yah. yah yah yah...<br />
<br />
Mechanics who can't fix a car,<br />
Politicians who can't think!<br />
The salesman who won't leave me alone,<br />
The waiter who forgot my drink!<br />
<br />
(Refrain)<br />
Boot to the head! Yah, yah..<br />
Boot to the head! Yah, yah..<br />
Boot to the head! Yah, yah..<br />
BOOT TO THE HEAD
